Saturday 9 May 2015

Film: Wild Tales

There were a number of Meetup walks and such happening today, but I really wouldn't have been up to them. Instead, I decided, if I could find an interesting film, I'd go to that. Top of the list was a Bollywood film, Piku; the story of an only daughter taking her 90-year-old father and his toilet troubles on a road trip looked promising, until I saw her love interest. Ay-ay! Sorry, but I can't buy him as a romantic lead.

Three films vied for second place on the list - including Wild Tales. Co-produced by Almodóvar, the trailer for this was fantastic and I salivated when I discovered how highly it was rated on IMDB. A no-brainer then - and with its closest screening location being the Curzon Soho, I could eat in Chinatown beforehand.

Dunno what it is, but I seem to be surrounded by Spanish-speakers lately. On the Tube last night, headed to the concert, a couple of ladies opposite me were having a conversation in Spanish - notable, because one of them had the most piercing voice.. really, people were turning to look at her. Tonight, there were Spanish speakers on the Tube, on the street, at the cinema (appropriately), on the Tube home..

I keep forgetting just how busy central London gets at the weekends - the barriers in Leicester Square were left open because of the crowds. I didn't have a definite place in mind in Chinatown - my old favourites have gone downhill, indeed one has closed. So I wandered onto Gerrard Street, and picked one nearby, purely because I liked the chandelier in the entrance. New Loon Fung was the name, and it's next door to a supermarket of the same name.

As I say, it's got one of those whopping chandeliers, and mirrored walls line the narrow staircase to the first floor, where the restaurant is. I was shortly shown to a table - apparently, this is one of the largest restaurants in Chinatown. I just read a review that mentions a quiet dining experience - well, of course, that depends on the diners, because I was right beside a large table of middle-aged gents out for a night on the tiles. Who were not quiet. The stereo system was also playing up, and kept blasting out music at full volume, leading to a stream of staff rushing upstairs periodically to fix it.

I don't know why, but the honey and lemon chicken on the menu caught my eye. I never have it - it used to be my mother's dish at the Chinese. But they didn't have any of my regular choices. So I had that - no starter, I didn't see one that appealed. I ordered a glass of wine, which was predictably small - and after a while, a large plate of lemon and honey chicken arrived, with a side order of rice. She insisted on both placing the napkin on my lap, and dishing out my rice for me - although she had to run when the manager needed her somewhere else - they were having a busy night!

Well, this was a revelation - it was absolutely delicious! And in short order, I scoffed the lot. I'd definitely come back here for the food - although the service was peremptory, if polite. It was nearly impossible to get anyone's attention once I'd got my initial order. Rule of thumb - don't ask anyone in a suit; they say "of course", and proceed to do something entirely different and forget all about you. I can vouch for this - I was facing the kitchen / bar / service area. So I finally got a dessert menu when I asked someone not wearing a suit. Then I was waiting for ages for them to take my dessert order - well, I was killing time before the film anyway. Still, as I played Solitaire on my phone, I made my usual deal with myself that if I finished the game before anyone took my order, I wouldn't have dessert, I'd just leave.

He arrived just before I finished the game. I just had ice cream - it took a little while to arrive, but there was plenty of it, and at £2.50 it's the best value ice cream in the West End! Mind you, it took forever to eat with the teaspoon I had to use.. and finally, of course, I waited for the bill. I asked a guy in a suit, who beamed at me, said "of course" and went off to make tea. Now, the time to leave was drawing near, and after I'd been waiting for five minutes (and finished my game of Solitaire), I used the old trick of getting up and putting on my coat. I got the bill within 10 seconds. Oh, and although they add an automatic service charge, it's not itemised - so don't tip extra. No complimentary mint, I noticed..

On my way downstairs, the combination of patterned carpet, bright chandelier, and mirrored walls was a bit dazzling, but I got out safely, and the cinema is, of course, just round the corner. There's a cat-and-mouse game with the traffic as you cross the road - the nearest pedestrian crossing is inconveniently far away. But the drivers were obliging, and we pedestrians were daring enough tonight that it didn't take too long.

I was a bit phased when I got inside - it's a while since I've been here, and they've done away with the box office! Instead, you buy your ticket at the bar - although the bar on the next level down also sells them, and is probably a better option if it's crowded. As I waited, I noticed a basket that said "Free!" on the side, and contained the following:


See, the Curzon Soho is to fall victim to the Crossrail project (the website has a link to a petition, BTW..)

Anyway, while we can still go there, the screens are on the very bottom level, and I headed straight down there. The railings on the stairs are interesting, with braille dots to indicate when you're on the last few steps of that flight. I had to turn around for a minute to find my screen, but found it in due course. Seating was allocated, the screen being over 2/3 full.

After some interesting trailers - including one for what looked like a Muslim vampire movie - the main feature finally started. Goodee! Now, this film comprises six short stories. And these stories concern people who are vexed in some way. You know the things that really vex you? the people who've wronged you or your family, the aggressive driver, the car tow people, the unfaithful partner?

Heh. You know how these people generally seem to get away with it? Not in this marvellous film, they don't! This is the most gleeful revenge film I've ever seen. You. Will. Not. Believe. how the stories pan out. So often I was staring at the screen, shaking my head, mouthing "They wouldn't..! They didn't!" But they would, they did.

Some you can see coming, some are completely unexpected. But they're vibrant, witty, and utterly entertaining. The direction is really clever, the soundtrack speaks volumes. And it is hilarious. My recommendation for Film of the Year so far! I can't recommend this highly enough. GO SEE!!

Tomorrow, I think I'll head to a film again. Top of the remaining list was another Bollywood comedy - Uttama Villain. My objection to that is I simply didn't find the trailer funny! There are a few more not showing tomorrow, then several tying at 7.6. I'm inclined to see Woman in Gold, in which Helen Mirren plays a real-life Jewish refugee, trying to recover her family's famous painting, which was stolen by the Nazis. Problem is, the Austrian government has it now, and is unwilling to give it back. Showing at several different times in Cineworld Fulham. We'll see what time I drag myself out for!

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